“If anyone is above reproach, the husband of one wife, and his children are believers and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination. For an overseer, as God’s steward, must be above reproach. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain, but hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined. He must hold firm to the trustworthy word as taught, so that he may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine and also to rebuke those who contradict it.” Titus 1:6-9
The saying is trustworthy: If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church?” 1 Timothy 3:1-16
We often look at this scripture in the context of church leadership, or elders in the church, however, it is worthy to note that this should apply in all leadership.
To answer this question, let’s examine what happens when our house is a place of discord. Can you lead well?
The answer would be no. If you are a woman, strife at home would be usually carried throughout your day and would play on your mind. You may be physically present, but emotionally concerned over your family. If you are a man, you may be able to hide it better, but the stress would take it’s toll physically. When things are not well at home- when our children are rebelling, when our spouse is distant/unhappy/angry- it affects us on some level. You begin to dread going home, or feel deeply saddened. Taking children out that are not well-behaved or well-mannered cause anxiety and awkwardness. Having a spouse beside you who is angry or unsupportive also creates tension. If you are always worried about home, your kids, or whether your spouse will still be there, you cannot lead effectively.
Additionally, public versus private personna… private doesn’t stay private too long. Eventually, no matter how constrained you are, eventually your true self and your feelings will come spilling out. You can’t really hide who you are for too long, no matter how hard you try. And if you do and succeed… your spouse will give you away.
If you want a true picture of someone, just ask their family. Question is, would you want people to see that picture of you?
The key to being a successful leader truly begins in the home. Our homes are our first ministry, and should be taken seriously. When all is well at home- when our spouse is supportive, our children are disciplined, and where there is joy- we are able to thrive as leaders. Also, if a person cannot manage their home well, what makes you think that they can lead a company well? Food for thought.
In our February issue, we will discuss why leading well at home is so important, and why God places importance in this area of leadership. What does successful leadership at home look like, and what is good discipline practices? If discord exists, or if your spouse has stopped being supportive, we will teach you how to get your marriage back on track.
Our next issue comes out on January 26, 2018 across all social media, on our website, and via our free subscription.